After deliberations, Shaastra Evolve has decided to scrap “Symposium on Rural Education” on the grounds that it was too vanilla to generate media or public interest. The Leaks team caught up with Co-core D, of Shaastra Evolve fame, yesterday for clarifications on this issue.

“After last year’s Symposium turned out to be so popular with people who couldn’t relate to the rest of Shaastra, we thought we should expand the idea a little. The problem with a subject like rural education is that the discussion will peter off into agreements: ‘Indeed, the development of rural education is critical’, or ‘Let us all agree to work for the betterment of Rural Education’. Then they will have a toast, leave a crate of Harper Collins books lying around, and go home. There’s no conflict of ideas.”, whereupon Leaks inquired if that was really necessary.

“That’s why we’ve introduced a new topic with more masala”, D continued without heed, “or shall we say, more room for discussion: Gay Marriages. Everyone involved with Symposium has welcomed this concept with open hands. The Co-Curricular Affairs Secretary, who had previously described Symposium as a mountain of monkey droppings, now shows unusual interest in our event.”

Preparations for selection of Symposium participants have already begun. D had hinted in his press-conference that the new Symposium will include VCs by a number of eminent personalities from the world of cinema and music who made their fame by being gay, such as Shia LaBoeuf,  Robert Pattinson and Britney Spears. The Pope has been confirmed to give a short inauguration speech by VC, relaying the Church’s views on same gender marriage.

“The Symposium has a two pronged approach,” Co-Core D stated, “policy making and technology recommendations.” To this effect, several NGO representatives are visiting the Symposium, although organizers have avoided speaking further about relevant technological recommendations. Symposium will begin on October 1^st with the unfurling of a rainbow flag.

” Disclaimer: Everything on these pages is parody. No endorsements by any company or person parodied is intended or inferred.

Today morning, at a press conference, it was announced that the position of Co-curricular Affairs Secretary, fondly called CoCAS has been scrapped with immediate effect, sending shock waves across the institute, taking everyone by surprise, including the CoCAS himself. The CoCAS, being a Mallu pledged that he will bring down the administration with the help of his comrades from the Communist Party.

The mood in the insti following the announcement was grim. To show their solidarity with CoCAS, students have decided to conduct a silent protest in front of Dean’s Office tomorrow at 2 PM. “This is outrageous. CoCAS is our Thalaivar. We have formed a committee Silent Protest Organizing Committee, Kerala(S.P.O.C.K) and have decided to march to Dean’s Office and show him the finger, er.. the Vulcan finger for peace.”, said JC Joseph, a disgruntled party member.

Shaastra Leaks approached the administration to find out the reason behind this sudden and shocking decision. On the condition of anonymity, the Dean(Students) admitted that it was forced upon them by the senate.

The dean had this to say: “I am sorry that extreme action had to be taken but it can’t be helped. Two freshers were hospitalized yesterday after both of them complained of facing severe emotional trauma, being exposed to ‘bad words’. Preservation of Innocent Minds of People, IIT Madras (P.I.M.P.IIT), a committee headed by senior faculty members, keen on preventing further cases of similar nature gave a recommendation to the senate that along with CoCAS, ASES India Summit should be scrapped too, which we will be doing shortly.”

We at Shaastra Leaks have made a suggestion that CoCAS should henceforth be called “KICK-AS” to which the visibly happy dean replied that it will be taken into consideration in the next senate meeting.

” Disclaimer: Everything on these pages is parody. No endorsements by any company or person parodied is intended or inferred.